The Memory Keeper's Daughter

I am almost half way through this book http://www.memorykeepersdaughter.com/ by Kim Edwards... but feel absolutely no desire to finish it. I am not one to quit reading a book to start another, but I just can't bring myself to finish it.

When I'd first heard people talking about it I was compelled to pick it up. Now I am compelled to put it down and never look back. I cannot seem to pinpoint what it is that's lacking, but it just is not doing it for me. I thought I was alone in my dissatisfaction of this book until last night. I attended a small dinner party and decided to ask my cousin for her input. She then told me that her sentiments towards the book were the same! She's made it half way through then given up.

Hmmmmm... Any suggestions for a good read?

Patience...

I've been thinking a lot about patience lately, for more than one reason. The first being that around this time of the year it seems like all semblance of patience goes down the drain. People become rude, often annoyed by having to wait in lines, and some become downright pushy.

The second reason is that I have been patiently awaiting my moving day. This has been hard in so many ways. I have always been an incredibly patient person by nature. This quality has helped me through countless tough situations. But I find myself getting restless. The worst part of it is that I feel like I am wishing the days away instead of enjoying these last few weeks with my friends and family. The great part is that nobody else seems to notice my restlessness, as they are all too busy being impatient themselves.

Many of the world's religious scripts and great writers preach that patience is the key to many great things in life. If you practice patience on a daily basis you are so much further ahead of those who choose to be quick-tempered and impatient.

So for the next few weeks I am going to stop living two steps ahead. It doesn't feel very good anyways! I've made plans with friends and family to spend time together before I go and I am looking forward to the downtime in between! Taking a moment to realize that I'd been overlooking the amazing things right in front of me has really opened my eyes. A little patience goes a long way!

A night out

I am going out tonight with the kids from work. The agency that I work for has given us free concert tickets. This is a huge deal to some of these kids, as some of them have never been to a concert before. Its a night for us to spend with them. For us to provide them a moment to be a real kid. Their parents would never have been able to provide them with a "luxury" such as this. Most of their parents had probably never been to a concert themselves.

As I mentioned previously, this is my last week of working with them. So for me, its so much more than just a concert. I am not even scheduled to work, but I am going anyways to spend some time with them. This desire to just hang out with them is a constant reminder of why I entered this field of work in the first place. When they think that nobody cares about them, I do. Before I leave them for good, I want them to know that.

Some info about little old me

I dislike: pennies, early mornings, roses, being late, fake flowers, losing my keys, putting gas in my car, mondays, rules, fake people, fake hair, cruelty, misunderstandings, lack of sleep, deadlines, traffic, fast-paced lifestyles, time flying by, people who are too busy to have any fun, olives, betrayal, waiting for mail, Christmas (the sad side of it where people feel obligated to spend all their hard earned money..), rudeness, people who are too serious, papercuts, short bangs, broken hearts (not just mine), being sad, communism, poverty, world hunger, AIDS, politics, sharks, snakes, MICE!, pop, losing something, crime, garbage, judgmental people, people who refuse to admit that they're wrong, computers, big cities, homelessness...

I love: Halloween, dressing up, concerts, gerbera daisies, sleeping in, reading in bed, listening to music in the dark, being organized, fresh bedsheets, hot baths, chilli chicken and jasmine rice, spending time with kids, my job, college, travelling, road trips, BC (Ahhh....), beaches, my friends, black and white photography, bookstores (they're so hard to leave), bargain shopping, 80's culture, dancing, shower radios, being sarcastic, people who "get" my sarcasm, people who can laugh at themselves, camping, fishing, quading, scary movies, acoustic guitar, greenhouses, gardening, sushi, caesars, girl's nights, new friends, swimming, being outside, hiking, climbing, boating, log houses, weddings, painting, going to church, driving at night on the highway, drinking tea in my pj's, breakfast foods any time of the day, small towns, spending time with my mommy, baking...Random, I know.....

Chances

I truly believe in the power of giving people a second chance... Its unreal what can be accomplished if you let someone know that you believe that they are capable of change. In working with youth, you learn quickly that giving hope, encouragement and second chances may very well be the only way to get by. Everyone messes up. Some more than others, some never really stop but can't we have hope despite adversity?? Its the people in life that refuse to give first chances that never get anywhere. Take chances, give chances, abuse chances. There are, of course, exceptions to my beliefs. Shouldn't all beliefs be challenged? The exception is that there are also people that have used up all of their chances and have proven that they never deserved a second one in the first place. This is where we learn to forgive. Forgive those who walk amongst us knowing that they've abused all of their chances. As for the rest of us... Ask for a second chance, then use it wisely.

Here goes nothing!

This is what I've been up to lately...

I am in the process of leaving home and moving across Canada, Alberta to Nova Scotia. I am working my final week as a youth counselor, a job that I have been at for two years. In the past 6 months I packed all of my earthly posessions into boxes and stored them for safe-keeping. This in itself was a daunting task. I'd spent the past 16 years in the same bedroom... I had A LOT of stuff!

In the middle of all of this, I took off to Australia for a month to backpack up the east coast. After living comfortably out of a backpack for a month, I was inspired to come home and get rid of everything that I had no use for anymore.What felt like twenty-something garbage bags later, I moved my remaining posessions into the smallest bedroom in our house and set aside what I will need on my journey across the country.

I am spending Christmas with my family, then on December 26th, I will start the 5500km drive from here to NS (Its the middle of winter, in Northern Canada, I often question my sanity). But, with good company, great music and copious amounts of Chai Tea, I will arrive at my new home.

With this arrival comes many unknowns. First off, I have not successfully found a job there (How very irresponsible of me!). Secondly... ok who am I fooling! That's about the only thing that I have yet to figure out. But it is pretty huge nonetheless. Alas, this was my way of bringing you up to date on my life plans. This being said, I will be writing for the next few weeks about my cross-country adventure! Here's hoping that the weather holds out!

Wish me luck!!

Wintersleep...

Here http://www.wintersleep.com/ you will find my current favorite music... I will shamelessly admit that there is a personal connection to this band, but I truly think that you too will enjoy them. My closest and dearest friends are receiving copies of their newest album this Christmas and I figure that this can be my gift to all of you as well!

I would like to add that I pleaded with my friend Ryan, who is currently living in New Zealand, to download their current album and tell me what he thinks. I am pleased to report that he loved them! A very early Merry Christmas to you!

Music, oh Music how I love thee!

I have often wondered how people survive in life without music and books. What do they do in their spare time? I cannot honestly recall a day that I have not read, or listened to music.

My own mother is one of these people, which often leaves me puzzled as I am a book addict! I do not recall a day in my entire life where I saw her pick up a book for the simple pleasure of reading. I often try forcing my favorite books on her. Selling them like a preacher trying to sell God to a church full of non-believers. I tell her that its the greatest thing I have ever read! That the characters are so real and that the struggles that they endured were heart-wrenching, mind-blowing, teeth-clenching! You absolutely must read this book! Her response is always the same. She tries to distance herself as far away from this crazy book-preaching daughter of hers. She often walks away without any response whatsoever, leaving me puzzled. Why WOULDN'T she want to read it? It's fabulous! This is where I lack any understanding of what it is like NOT to love reading.

Then there are those who just don't appreciate great music! When people ask me who my favorite band is, my response is usually the same. "Band?" long pause... "Well, I love Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash! Radiohead and Pearl Jam are bands but more like religions to me. They are THAT amazing!" Then a longer, awkward pause. It's not to say that there are not other religious "Band-lovers" out there, I know tons of them. Most of my closest friends are religious about music in some way or another. But I am always disappointed when sombody brings up this oh-so-touchy subject only to respond... " Yeah I love the Pussycat Dolls THAT much" Ughhh! NOT THE SAME!

Ok, so maybe, just MAYBE I am a book/music snob. But I just do not see how the Pussycat Dolls even compare to the musical genius that is Dylan. Guess I'll never undertsand it! For now I am off to laze around and read my newest book find. Ah, life's most wonderous simple pleasure at my fingertips!

You DO NOT complete me!

So, I got thinking about the name of my blog and how it relates to my previous post about relationships and the book I just finished. When I chose the name of this blog last year, I had been thinking a lot about the meaning of the phrase and what it means to me. So, here is my best explanation for you.

When someone says to me, "He/she completes me", I cringe. I honestly recoil at this statement. I can't help but wonder what they were then, without this completion of themselves. Were they perhaps just a portion of a human being? A half of a soul? Do people really believe that someone else can complete them? I was told years ago that being in a relationship or partnership with somebody meant that you kept your current self intact, and added the new person to your already existant life. This makes perfectly good sense to me! I am me, you are you. You can be added or removed from my life and I am still a complete human being, with or without you.

The most important part of the name is that, as humans we are never complete. We are always changing, evolving, growing...

Until death do us part!

Eat, Pray, Love...

I just finished reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert and I must say, its been ages since a book has made me laugh out loud and cry! I was so moved by her strength. I can't begin to imagine how unhappy her life was pre-divorce, but the decision to leave it behind displayed strength beyond measure. There are people we all know that stay in their dreadful, passion-less relationships out of comfort, not joy. Its sad but true. If only they could walk away the way E.G. did... to find themselves again, or perhaps for the first time. She shows us just how important it is to be true to ourselves above all else.